This is usually the moment when I write something like ”Oh, so another year has passed… Let’s see what happened…” And I don’t intend to change that because another year has indeed passed so… let’s see what happened. More or less in chronological order.
Vanessa’s auto-biographical cut-up novel Things Happen was published, and it has definitely been one of my favorite books this year. It’s a really fascinating story (or several) of growing up as a teenager in 1990s Miami, covering the weirdness of Florida, coming of age thanks to/because of all kinds of experimentation, and a general esprit of street smart survival and good times. A rollercoaster memory lane from the point of view of a teenage girl. Much recommended.
Book-wise it was a good year, and I think it reflects me writing more in general. First up was the anthology In-between the Lines – Essays on Occulture, Magic and Seductive Zombie Strippers, which is the follow up to Occulture and Source Magic in many ways. Basically a collection of the most recent essays and lectures, displaying a gradual increase in thinking/writing about movies.
The Fenris Wolf 12 was published, and turned out to be a very fine issue indeed. So much great occultural writing by so many extremely talented writers; it was a joy and a pleasure to put together. As was the manifestation of the Fenris Wolf Substack (and podcast) to house faster news and writings like book reviews and reports that don’t really fit into Fenris the Book but definitely within Fenris the Mind-frame.
In October, my magical auto-biography Meetings with Remarkable Magicians – Life in the Occult Underground was published, and it was definitely a major step forward for me. Not only because of the book itself but because it signifies both symbolically and literally me coming out of my Second Saturn Return, ready to take on new existential-magical challenges with fresh energy. I not only wrote the book but also insisted on reading-recording it for the audio book edition, which was great fun.
In December, there was a return to a much beloved format: the photo book. I published Vimmerby: Hembygd & Omnejd, which is basically a declaration of love in photo form for the town we live in and all the amazing nature that surrounds it. Leaving Stockholm in 2021 opened my life and mind in so many ways, and one of the best results has been a renewed love for photography, both old/archival and new. This book is the first of many photo books to come – next up will be More Americans, with black and white images from my first phase of American travels (1989-2012).
I also diligently wrote for our Patreon’s Magic Monday section, about or magical work in theory & practice. On that note, volume 3 of the Magic Monday anthology will be published in 2025.
Also lecturing and essay writing… I presented a four session class on Satanic Magic for Morbid Anatomy online in the summer, and followed up with a four session class on Occult Cinema in the fall, which was great fun. Video recordings of these classes are available at the Fenris Wolf Substack, and are worth checking out. I love lecturing and ”presenting” papers, so it was nice to be invited to do that in vivo as well, at a conference at Copenhagen University in the fall.
In terms of music, not much… The beautiful label Zoharum re-issued White Stains’ 1991 album Dreams Shall Flesh in a slightly ”reduxed” form, and that was fun to see/hear. But this was very much a year of the word that eventually merged with the image towards the end of the year. We shall see if music makes its return at some point. I guess one thing that is inevitable when slowly growing older is that you realize that the energy levels are not as high as they used to be in terms of juggling many projects at the same time. Perhaps that is even a good thing?
One of the greatest developments this year was the going public with my Source Magic Mentorship. Whereas I have previously had one on one sessions with people I would call magical students, I now offer consultations and magical coaching for those who are interested and/or in need. I love the ”format” and people have been very positive throughout the year. If you’re interested, just get in touch and we can have a short conversation to see if Source Magic Mentorship is for you. For me, this is very much a part of the the new phase I mentioned before: stepping out of my Second Saturn Return and entering a new role or Gestalt for those in the ”Community” who feel a resonance with my experience and expressions. On that note, I attach a text/post here from earlier in the year which sums up my attitude towards this.
In the new year, this ”presence” will also lead to me giving ”readings” or what I call ”runacles” (rune casting as an ”analytical” or oracular tool for other people). If you’re interested in booking a session, feel free to contact me (via this platform or e-mail me at carl AT carlabrahamsson DOT com ).
As the year ended, Vanessa and I celebrated our eighth anniversary as a married couple. So I would like to also mention all the great work she has been doing with the Rendering Unconscious podcast, writing, classes, projects etc. I recommend checking out her website for more information about everything, including her psychoanalytic sessions with people all over the world. I am especially impressed by her collaborations with British musician Pete Murphy: so far they’ve made 18 albums together, and they’re all amazing. Check them out here.
Thanks for being interested in what I do. It’s been a great year, and I look forward to 2025 eagerly. I hope you’ll join me on the journey.
Vade Ultra!
Vimmerby, Dec 30 2024
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Magic Monday: Coming Into My Own
Last week Vanessa and I were in Stockholm. That in itself was a big thing as we hadn’t visited our old hometown for two and a half years. It was just a brief in-and-out, and no really major changes could be seen in the urban landscape, thank the gods!
The reason for our trip was that I had been invited to introduce two new documentaries at Bio Capitol, Stockholm’s best indie cinema. The films? Scott Cummings’s ”Realm of Satan” and David Charles Rodrigues’s ”S/He Is Still Her/e” about Church of Satan members and Genesis P-Orridge, respectively. We had seen both films before, and like them a lot. So it was honoring to be invited even though they aren’t ”my” films in any way. Well… I am in ”Realm of Satan” briefly, and the final credits music is the old White Stains classic ”Sweet Jayne.” And the Gen film uses videos and photos I’ve shot, so… I’m in there a little bit.
So far, so good. Lovely evening; meeting up with old friends, some of which we hadn’t met since before the pandemic – the last occasion for most of us was actually the screening of my LaVey documentary ”Into the Devil’s Den” in January of 2020 at the very same cinema!
Back at the hotel and trying to sleep, various mind-threads gelled and led to an insight…
No wonder really, as that night contained a full moon lunar eclipse in Pisces (here’s how the renowned astrologer Chani described it: ”This event spotlights anything lurking in the shadows, and as the first lunar eclipse of its kind in nearly two decades, it denotes a new wave of artistry, idealism, and mysticism. Because the eclipse is also conjunct Neptune (the planet of illusion), it pulls focus toward any ways we’ve been deceiving ourselves. But/and Saturn (the planet of structure) is nearby in Pisces, bringing a touch of pragmatism to the party. So follow your whims — just don’t forget to come back down to Earth.”)
During both introductions I had told the same old story once again: my mid 1980s admiration for LaVey and Jayne Mansfield led to the White Stains record ”Sweet Jayne” which Genesis P-Orridge suggested I send to LaVey just for the hell of it. Which I did, and which led to me getting a very nice letter back, and with LaVey making me a member of the Church of Satan. And eventually a long and fruitful friendship. One of life’s little mysteries, apparently, how doors can open up when you least expect them to… Small decisions and creations can lead to massive transformations of your life.
Further on down the line, I paid my dues both backwards and forwards, in, for instance, the ”Change Itself” film and Sacred Intent book (about Gen), and the ”Into the Devil’s Den” film and Anton LaVey and the Church of Satan book. Because that’s what you do: you honor the teachers and mentors, and carry on in a similar spirit, yet in your own language and energy frequency.
But the insight you’re so politely waiting for is this… A classic ”What if?” Or, rather, a ”What if not?” conundrum. What if I hadn’t sent that record to LaVey in the first place? I would definitely not have been there in that moment at that cinema… and would that double bill even have happened? LaVey and Gen would of course have existed anyway and left their marks. But I do believe my working with their ”spirits” and presences in writing my own biographies over the past decade have helped them both resurface considerably. That has been intentional on my part.
My perceived centrality of the moment (as ”introducer”) didn’t only have to do with my own feeling appreciated; I was also literally re-experiencing part of my magical lineage in a poetic vortex that also included the audience itself (which contained Stockholm old school TOPY, OTO and Church of Satan people with whom I have worked magically over the decades) as a fascinating resonance box. In ”Realm of Satan” I read from the Swedish translation of LaVey’s Satanic Bible that I published in 1996, and the film itself ends with my own literal entry into LaVey’s / the Devils’ Den by playing ”Sweet Jayne.” And in the ”S/He is Her/e” film my integrated video of Gen reciting a poem (from ”Change Itself”) really rocked me because I was the one filming that poetic delivery (Oslo, 2014) with my camera/eye – with Gen literally talking to me:
Cut your SELF up,
See who you really are…
See who is really there…
The more detached one is from a role in someone elses’s script
The easier it becomes to create a new one.
Is THIS you?
Is this contrived character YOU?
Who is directing YOU?
Who is directing who?
There are more than one of you.
Choose another you.
Although I have read and heard this so many times, it sort of penetrated my rational resistance in that moment at the cinema. So true! I have come a long way, and soon it’s time for the RELEASE of my autobiography Meetings with Remarkable Magicians (Oct 1st). Is this a shedding of skin, a rebirth, a metamorphosis, a reformulation…? Am I now detached from my role in someone else’s script? I would say so, and hope so!
The full moon lunar eclipse and on to the very recent Autumnal Equinox (and today’s 23 celebration ov course!) was also tied to a text I wrote in my notebook the week before – and actually fiddled with on the train up to Stockholm. Sometimes I just write stuff, and it never ends up anywhere. But revisiting this text just a few days ago, it made such perfect sense in the big scheme of things; I can see it totally connected to the cosmic shifts as well as my insights post-movie-introductions.
I guess the moral or teaching of this story is that there are always full circles going on, but of different sizes and importances. Intuitive creativity is a very powerful form of psychoanalysis that leaves self-awareness (and self-deception) behind. When you take a step back and check not only what’s going on at work (whichever that may be or mean) but also the astrology and also your ongoing intuitive creations, you are very likely to reach insights like mine: I am ready to rock, on my own, and in my own words. Respect where respect is due, and much love and gratitude in paying backwards and forwards. But the only time is now, no matter how comfortable it is at times to cling to the past.
On that note, here is the text I wrote the week before the Stockholm trip:
Authority
Recently, I fully embraced my magical authority. Quite simply, this was done not by mental shenanigans but by beginning to (inter)act within the role. A positioning of myself inside a force field that already existed, in great part thanks to the long-time projections of others. It’s remarkable how hard this has been for me. Beginning to help others see themselves was a great help in this process. Concretely, to ”launch” the Source Magic Mentorship and not only get acknowledgments (as per usual) but also commercialized interactions. I love the model, the modality, the modus (operandi). I am simply so good at being the spiritual/magical teacher! I have come into my own.
While on the podcast ”Occult Rejects” recently I had to formulate myself as well as the Meetings with Remarkable Magicians book for unknowing yet fairly curious Americans. Focusing not only on my pedigree but also on my capacity to formulate and inspire by example made me realize that I am indeed very special and unique in the magical ”community.”
It’s taken me ”two times Saturn” to individuate to the degree I have. This is undoubtedly as important as the pedigree and teaching in itself… A balanced position within a scene or community that seems tho thrive on or even feed off imbalanced minds is truly unique.
What I can offer, I offer through the books and other creations, and also through the Source Magic Mentorships. It gives me great satisfaction to inspire people to help themselves, whether short or long term.
My experience is tangible and visceral, and I know very well how to share it with others. Those who are interested can take me at face value or as a composite of the pedigree and its glamor, or both. To me, it is now all the same.
The Society of Sentience as an anti-structure to facilitate accumulation of original material and its dissemination has grown very slowly and organically over the decades. The work has been private or shared with a very few. For me, it’s been very rewarding to be immersed in this kind of structural creation although essentially it’s not needed. But I accept my psychological predisposition and am more than willing to work with it. It is a learning process also for myself.
I would say that the Source Magic Mentorship is already integrated within the SoS, if it actually hasn’t been all along the way.
Integrated is also the system/anti-system called the No-handed Path, signifying a transcendental dissolution of attitudes and decidedly religious approaches within the so-called Left-handed Path (more so than in the Right-handed one). It makes a whole lot of sense housed within the already supremely holistic SoS model.
There is kinship/resonance with the ancient Green Dragon Society that has yet to be explained. But what I already have and have created is a remarkable accumulation of useable methods and philosophies that I know can help other people. A stronger synthesis and, paradoxically perhaps, anti-system will be beneficial for visibility and contacts.
Carl Abrahamsson, September 2023, finalized on the 23rd.
